So lately I’ve been having some really weird dreams, which doesn’t exactly help because they’re making me restless and hesitant to sleep and my job has had me getting up really early lately so I’m only getting about 5 hours of sleep a night. I know dreams are supposed to help you deal with your problems while you sleep, but I never actually really remember my dreams, unless its a really bad nightmare. The past few weeks tho, they seem to be about this kid I know and school, only school is out for the semester and we don’t even go to school together, in fact, he’s not even in school anymore. We seem to be in a relationship in the dreams, but he’s not always the one in the dream, and everyone keeps telling me that I’m probably trying to tell myself that I probably actually have feelings for this guy, which is something strange for me; it’s hard for me to find someone who can keep up with me and still tolerate me, but I know that’s not right. There are too many variables involved and I don’t feel even have that feeling towards him aside from occasionally wanting to shove my tongue down his throat. Key word: occasionally. I don’t even want to do it that often. I decided I wanted to stop the whole thing and that’s when the dreams started, but it stopped making sense more so than it did before, so why should I have it continue. I can’t give him everything he wants and I don’t want a relationship, not even considering what he thinks and feels, because lets be honest, I’m a ridiculous handful and I have no free time, I’m far from what anyone would call a “catch”. But I do want some peaceful sleep, I just don’t know what I’m trying to tell myself.